Smooth Sailing

Now that the Thanksgiving holiday has passed, I can finally catch up on blogging :) The dating world continues to be good to me. After narrowing down my dating team, I have been putting more focus on the guy, who we'll call Justin, who really caught my interest. And things have been great

Justin has continued to take me on wonderful dates and outings. He has a lot of great qualities; he's caring, sweet, romantic, Christian, and funny. I normally don't consider myself a lovey dovey type of person when it comes to dating and relationships, but I can already see Justin changing me. When we're having dinner, he grabs my hand at the table. When we get ready to head out, he helps me put my jacket on. When we watch TV, he rubs my hair. It's really weird at times to see myself so giddy with him but its also refreshing. In the past with guys, I've been very guarded. Justin has been very successful and is slowly (very slowly) melting the icebox that is (was) my heart.

Our conversations are what really make me feel continuously connected to him. We talk for hours about everything in life and in the news. The other day, we chatted about our Christian faith and how to integrate Christian values into today's family. The day before that we talked about places we want to visit and our biggest inspirations. Even his voice makes the conversation feel elevated. I feel so mushy right now because I'm literally smiling as I type.

I don't want to move too fast or "catch feelings" too quick, but I vow not to be as romantically rigid as before. He's a sweetheart and he treats me like a princess (honestly). Today I'm very happy with my dating life and I'm going to enjoy this moment.

The Bachelorette

I must say, I'm happy that my dating life has finally taken flight after a year of blah. It's exciting, fun and fresh. I get special dates, cute glances, hand holds and all that cute stuff. The only problem is that I feel guilty sharing those things with more than one person. Call it what you want, but I feel bad after having a date and smooches with guy and then doing the same with another guy two days later and then texting another after I leave that date. I have no idea how the people on The Bachelor or The Bachelorette can manage. In my rawest, truest form, I'm a sweetheart and a softy. And I can't do that to someone or myself. It's probably not the smartest idea to throw all my eggs in one basket and just focus on one guy at a time, but I think that's what will work best for me.

The tough part now is to go from a few suitors down to one. I have to have a couple uncomfortable conversations to let some know it's not going any further. I don't want to lead anyone on so I definitely need to do this sooner rather than later. Tonight I'll start with one. The main driving factor behind my feelings is that one guy definitely stands out from the pack. He takes me on awesome dates, is easygoing, he's manly, and most of all he loves the Lord. One day I was telling him about some issues I was having with a person who I felt like was taking advantage of my kindness, and he said, "Don't worry. Keep being yourself. God sees what you're doing and you'll be blessed because of it." Smarts are impressive, a great job is impressive, but a man who can connect with me and guide me on a spiritual level is the most impressive. I don't know exactly where I'm headed with this guy but he's not like anyone else I've met in awhile. I know he's looking for a committed relationship, and I asked him to give me time (at least a couple of months) to get to know him better. He's cool with that and I was glad to see he would be patient.

The only perks I'll miss of being The Bachelorette is being treated like a princess. I was definitely getting spoiled lol. I may revisit that dating lifestyle in the future, but for right now, I'll take things one guy at time.

Connection

Saturday night I went out with a college friend, his girl and his friend/brother. We chatted, saw a movie and grabbed dinner. I could already tell from the jump that my friend was trying to find a way to get me to interact with this "friend/brother" guy...and as a single girl, I appreciated it. It's always nice to have someone you know trying to set you up with someone they feel you'd be good with. I had met the guy before (he came to a get together at my place as my friend's guest) but this was my first time really getting to know him. It was a good time (though the action movie we saw had a lot of gore and head chopping going on lol).

At the end of the night, I bid adieu to my friend and his girlfriend and the guy walked me to my car. It was only supposed to take a minute but I ended up staying for around 5 hours. Somewhere in between the late night stroll, exchanged smiles and a good night, we both found ourselves utterly smitten. It was something like an unexplainable force field that made each of us want to just sit and talk and cuddle and even kiss until we couldn't anymore. There was heart racing infatuation yet comfort and easiness at the same time. Honestly, in those wee hours of the morning, I felt excited just to breathe his air and found an equal excitement with him. Childlike giddiness that I couldn't really explain...or deny. Our conversation bounced from life to things we like to do for fun to aspirations to disappointments. It felt like he was on my mental and emotional wavelength, and he was the best kiss I've had in years.

After our lengthy date, I drove home on a high from the night's events. I never even slept...just went straight to 7 AM church service. The rest of the day I thought about him and ignored those vain/materials factors (i.e. his lack of a good job) that I value which may prevent me from pursuing him on a serious level. We have date #2 planned for later this week :) I don't know where this could be headed or where he falls in my dating journey, but I know for certain that I want my last romance to be with someone who makes me feel the electric connection that I felt that night.

It's cool I got it

 First off, praise God for a victory for our President!! Last night was another great moment in African American and US history :)

Before all the polls were closed and votes were tallied, I found myself on date #2 with the same guy from the previous post. I know what you're thinking...."So soon?" lol...but it was his birthday and he asked to spend it with little old me. It's so funny because we I arrived at the date location, I saw a guy in the distance and thought "Dang, he's cute." Upon a closer look, I realized it was actually my date! He was very sharp for his birthday and I appreciated it :) We went to eat at a cute little retro burger place which was yummy and fun. Then we headed to the movies to see Looper (which was another great, action packed and thought provoking film--go see it!).  Once again, I did enjoy his company and he was fun to be around.  We talked politics, life and music at dinner and gasped and flinched at all the crazy moments during the movie. One of the main attracting factors that he has is his maturity. I've never dated a guy that was more than a year or two older (he's 4 years older) and the maturity and grown man swag is kinda nice.

The best part of the date was probably his surprise at the fact that I paid for dinner and the movie. I've never actually [willingly lol] paid for a date with a guy that wasn't my boyfriend. But I thought, it's his birthday, and I would be a jerk if I let him pay...everyone deserves to feel special at least once a year. At dinner he didn't even realized that I paid the bill while he slipped to the restroom, and when he found out I paid, he looked genuinely astonished. At the movies, I had to literally take his debit card out of his hand so he wouldn't pass it to the cashier. He said, "No, I got this at least," and I let him know that as a believer in birthdays, I wouldn't allow it lol.

I hardly know this guy but paying for that date felt right.  I felt so empowered to treat someone else to a nice evening and say "It's cool, I got it." Don't get me wrong, this will be strictly limited to birthdays and other yet to be designated days lol

***I love her cause she got her own***
She don't need mine, so she leave mine alone
There ain't nothing in this world sexy
Than a girl that want but don't need me
***Young independent, yea she work hard***

Back in the Game

So, last night I went on my first date since June :)

1) The location: Huge mall halfway between DC and Baltimore. We went to see Argo (which was one of the best movies I've seen in a while BTW...Go see it!), then had dinner and fun at Dave & Buster's

2) Date: He was the person depicted in his profile lol, which was a plus. You never know with online dating. His listed height is 6'2", but I give him 5'11" at best....I was wearing wedge boots so maybe my perception was off, but I'm only 5'4" and he wasn't that much taller than me. He wore a nice shirt and jeans, was well groomed and was on time :)

3) My outfit: 

4) First interaction: So we totally had a cornball first date moment that went something like this:
Him: How are you?
Me: I'm good, how are you?
Him: I'm good, how are you?
Me: That's good. How are you?
(Repeat one more time)
I am dead serious. I admit, I can be a bit awkward around guys I'm first getting to know but he seemed as equally nervous as me which made me feel a little bit better.

5) The movie: Not much time to talk but I definitely enjoyed the bits of conversation we did have. The only weird part was his heavy breathing/wheezing. I swear it was he on he verge of an asthma attack for the first half hour. The pharmacist in me wanted to hand him an albuterol right quick. He was kinda sweaty too at first. It was probably just nerves and it was cute though strange.

6) Dinner: We ended up sitting at the bar and eating dinner at Dave and Buster's. It was nice. We had good food and watched a bit of the Miami-Knicks game and just chatted. I did alot more of the talking (like usual lol) initially as he seems to be more quite/reserved but after a while the convo picked up and all was well.

7) Games: The highlight of the night was playing the games. I definitely took him off guard by whooping him in the basketball shootout game. It was pretty hilarious because before he saw the final score, he started celebrating because he assumed he won. When the scores came out, he was so shocked that little old me had some basketball skills (I'm the baby Kobe of the Eastern Shore....jk). That started a fun evening of trash talk and competitiveness. We played alot of other games from shooting, trivia, skee ball, etc. He won me a plush Ravens football in one of those superhard grab machines too.

8) Overall: It was a good date. He was kind and chivalrous (he opened doors and his wallet lol). Personality wise, he's a just a bit more introverted and reserved than my usual type but he's easygoing and has a great smile. I'm not really sure if I'm attracted to him per se, which is weird. It definitely felt more like I had fun hanging out with a guy friend versus lovey dovey-ness. Although, I kinda like that because I prefer for someone to get to know me before they start trying to sneak a kiss or grab my hand. He's a good Christian guy and it was quite refreshing....we have plans for a second date next week. Stay tuned!